Saturday, January 23, 2016

Fathers taking a selfie with their daughters is not going to change anything

Have you ever wondered why some people just cannot be themselves in their own place?

I mean...the place where one was born and brought up.

I will elaborate.....

Years ago…to be precise, when I was about 18 years, I got enrolled myself in a public library. It was just a stone’s throw away from my house and my college. Nearby is the famous Kerala Sahitya Academy. I could have easily gone and spend some time, there. But I never did.

Whenever I used to go there, I was always accompanied.  I had to wait till my father takes a leave so that he could accompany me. Thankfully, we could, then keep books for one month. Otherwise, I would have been forced to cancel my membership.

My father would wait at the entrance of the library. Because only members were allowed inside and I could see him signaling me every minute to make it fast….( Make it fast …and that too in a library).

Things have not changed, even now.

I am a journalist and have been working and living alone for more than nine years. Still, I am not allowed out of my house in my home town, alone. Why so?

 They cite a very logical reason – You will always remain our little girl…I am happy being one. But I do not understand why the little boy always becomes a big man; even though he will be years younger to you.

His opinions matters and mine just ignored. Why you have to rebel all the time for your rights? Now, I understand “ fathers taking a selfie” with their daughters is not going to solve the problem ( It was a campaign started by the Prime Minister of India)

I believe I have handled my career and life to the best of my ability. If not, I would have ended up in the four walls of any house. And I am sure; I would have gone berserk.  (I am notorious for throwing tantrums….)


I am somebody who has also reveled in the thought of unraveling ‘me’. It is the greatest mystery I have ever encountered.

The little child inside me just bounces and bounces while discovering those deep hidden desires of the heart. And each time, I evolve and become a better person.

But it all goes for a toss when I am in my home town. Why so? Even without my own knowledge, I start behaving as if I am bound by the society. I laugh, cry, talk and behave according to the norms.

 Forget about ‘Thinking’…My head is all blocked. Nothing sensible would come out of it. Instead of a voice, various voices start to speak. You feel like you are back to square one

When you are out of your place, you are just ‘You’. You are nobody's daughter or sister or niece and you are not bound by the society.